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ioSOLOio Amministratore


Registrato: 12/09/03 19:01 Messaggi: 16342 Residenza: in un sacco di...acqua
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Inviato: 18 Mar 2006 18:24 Oggetto: Tutto in un minuto |
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Per chi ha fretta..
..per chi non vuol perdere tempo...
...per chi va subito al sodo..
# Movie a Minute .....film condensati
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Julia Roberts : I'm a hooker, but I don't kiss on the lips.
Richard Gere : I have a lot of money.
Julia Roberts : (smooch)
THE END
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> Titanic, Ultra-Condensed by Samuel Stoddard
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Leonardo DiCaprio : Your social class is stuffy. Let's dance with the ship's rats and have fun.
Kate Winslet : You have captured my heart. Let's run around the ship and giggle.
(The ship SINKS)
Leonardo DiCaprio : Never let go.
Kate Winslet : I promise. (lets go)
THE END
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ioSOLOio Amministratore


Registrato: 12/09/03 19:01 Messaggi: 16342 Residenza: in un sacco di...acqua
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Inviato: 18 Mar 2006 18:26 Oggetto: |
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e anche per chi non ha tempo di leggere....
# Book A Minute
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HAL : I'm evil. (kills astronauts)
Dave Bowman : I must shut you down now, HAL.
HAL : Daisy, Daisy...
Dave Bowman : Now I must finish this mission alone.
(STRANGE THINGS happen, and they MAKE SENSE)
Reader : Wow. I understand the movie now.
THE END
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> A Midsummer Night's Dream di William Shakespeare, Ultra-Condensed by David J. Parker and Samuel Stoddard
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Hermia, Lysander, Demetrius, and Helena : We're all in love with each other the wrong way around.
(Everyone goes into the woods. They have wacky experiences, pair off correctly, and live happily ever after.)
THE END
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> The Rime of the Ancient Mariner, Ultra-Condensed by Rachele di Tullio
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Ancient Mariner : I am creepy and old. Listen to me.
Wedding Guest : I'm late, but I'll listen.
Ancient Mariner : I killed an albatross. Then everyone died.
THE END
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> The Odyssey di Omero, Ultra-Condensed by Samuel Stoddard and David J. Parker
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Odysseus : I rule.
Poseidon : For your sin of pride, I curse you for all eternity.
(Unfazed, Odysseus boards his ship and sets SAIL for Greece, where his family is awaiting his RETURN from Troy. A STORM happens, and it drives them off course into the MEDITERRANEAN, where they come upon a strange LAND owned by the giant Cyclops POLYPHEMUS who eats some of the men ALL UP, but then they ESCAPE. Still lost, they run into the island of the sorceress CIRCE who turns some of Odysseus' men into ANIMALS, and it takes YEARS before they escape, and then they sail by some singing SIRENS, but they can't hear because they have STUFF in their ears. Then they come upon an island where there is a field of HERBS, and they all get HIGH, until Odysseus says it's time to GO. Then Odysseus' men let a WIND out of a BAG, and some more men DIE. And they sail on to HADES to talk to some DEAD people, and some more men DIE. And they steer the ship between the six headed monster SCYLLA and the torrential whirlpool CHARYBDIS, and Scylla makes some more men DIE, and Charybdis makes the rest of them DIE. Then the ship busts up into a JILLION pieces, but Odysseus is SAVED by the nymph Calypso who confines him to her ISLAND because she thinks he's HOT, and she wants his BODY. Then years later she lets him GO, but Poseidon is determined to terrorize him FURTHER.
And then SUDDENLY Odysseus has an IDEA)
Odysseus : Poseidon, I am sorry.
Poseidon : Ok, you can go home now.
(Odysseus goes home)
THE END
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fdd Dio maturo


Registrato: 22/04/05 01:33 Messaggi: 1734 Residenza: Giusto dietro l'angolo
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Non puoi inserire nuovi argomenti Non puoi rispondere a nessun argomento Non puoi modificare i tuoi messaggi Non puoi cancellare i tuoi messaggi Non puoi votare nei sondaggi
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